Oh right

Sorry about that. School has been distracting me and stuff. I just feel kind of rambly so I figured I might as well do it here where no one has to look at it. Uh... I have to finish reading Wuthering Heights and write an essay on it and some article thingy. I want to go GR GR IS SO STUPID! with no reasoning behind it, but I can't really. I do appreciate literature, just not when I like have to go out of my way too... It was probably a bad idea to take AP Lit this year when that's the one AP class I'd be horrible at the exam for. I'm great at math and scilence, but nooo, let's have stupid ideas instead. :[

I really do like writing, but not in that way. No one wants an essay for any reason ever unless you're going to be a professional essay-eer. I know writing skills are important, and I frigging have them. Pulling "meaning" out of my anus and writing about it isn't going to have any significance. I know it shows I'm capable of learning, BUT I'D RATHER CAPE OF LEARNING SCIENCE OR SOMETHING THAT ISN'T STUPID AND ENTIRELY SUBJECTIVE. :[

But anyway I'm doing unusually well in schools this year which is why I've not updated this, along with lack of interest. Due to the second half of the semester rolling around and stuff becoming slightly harder and more time-consumings, I've started wondering about why I'm actually doing it and stuff. As a logical being, I can realize I'd probably be able to blow some of this off and just straggle along like I always have been, but something over the last year has changed and made me give a crap about staying up to date and whatnot. It's all easy, just... time consuming... That's probably part of the reason I have trouble reading books. I have enough vocabularies and reading comprehension and speed that I can do it with minimal effort, problem is it's boring and monotonous. If they could come up with a better form of books, I'd treat it as a much better form of media. I don't really approve of media that you can't multi-task while doing, though. Music, television, even vidya games to some extent are all activities you can do while recieving other input. It's just too much effort and not quite enough rewarding to read stories in book format, when visual and audio formats are easier to recieve and more pleasing. Even stories on the internet, which I read quite a few of, are better than these ridiculous papyrus contraptions... I can have several windows open, and read it while activelyh doing other things, rather than having to completely stop and lose any immersion... Oh well, enough ranting there.

Last couple days I've been feeling a tiny bit depressed and stuff. Don't really know why. I'm assuming it's lonliness, although I can't figure out why. Maybe it's more like my hormones rebelling at me for not being around the ladies enough. Well, actually, I'm almost positive it's that, although I don't really know how to deal with it. I guess I'm around the ladies enough, but I'm just kind of too shy of af person. Plus for some reason my parents are kind of ultra-conservative there even though they're filthy liberals everwhere else... Maybe they aren't, and I'm just convincing myself it as an excuse to remain shy and mostly anti-social. I have to hand it to myself, I'm slowly becoming more and more social, which has been pretty hard for me. Not quit enough to really affect much though. I think I'll probably feel better once I finish this stupid book and the stupid things I have to do with it, so at least I'll have that off my back and I can just zone out the rest of the day. No one wants to hear me whining about this though, and I know I'll come back later and be horribly embarrassed by it. Sorry, future self. I didn't mean tooo :[

So anyway I forgot to tell you guys I raped the SAT. Got a 780 in math and a 730 in the other dumb subjects. Well, grammar's pretty cool. I actually did really well there but my score got knocked down a tad due to the fact 25-minute essays are a horrible idea, even worse than the test itself. At least hardly anyone cares about the grammar score, and I still hit 1500 with the two that do matter, which is a cutoff point for scholarships and stuff I think. I also took the PSAT and I think I did pretty well. Don't know if I got the National Merit thingy or not yet. Regardless, educationally my life's pretty rad, although that may be about the only place I'm fully happy with at the moment.

I actually have started up some artistic endeavors I've been ignoring for a while as well, which is pretty satisfying. Most of them are about video games, which is kind of annoying now. I wish I had a slight b it more creativity... I wrote a fantasy short story once. It was pretty lame, but in retrospet, I should've worked on more in its series or something for nanopoly. Maybe net year, if there IS a next year with our HUSSAIN ASOMA TERRIRIST MASLIM COMMIE SOCIALIST PRESIDENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sO ANYWAY DANG WHAT WAS i TALKING ABOUT?

bUT NO SERIOUSLY, AS A SCIENCEFAG IT SEEMS A BIT WEIRD WHEN i THINK ABOUT HOW MUCH i NEJOY THE ARTISTICS. i GUESS IT'S LEFTOVER FROM MY NATURAL HUMAN INSTINCTS AND DESIRE TO BE ACCEPTED BY OTHER HUMANS, AS WELL AS FIGURING "HEY THIS IS ABOUT ALL i'M GOOD FOR AT THE MOMENT AS ROBOTS WILL BE REPLACING ABOUT EVERYTHING ELSE SOON AND THEN EVENTUALLY THIS BUT BECAUSE i'LL BE A WEIRD MINORITY HUMAN ART MIGHT BE POPULAR BY OUR ROBOT OVERLORDS." Um, I don't remember if I hsad that in quotes or not. I'm writing this lying down and not looking at the screen, which helps me express my thoughts or something better, so don't mind my typos. I should get most of them afer I proofcheckitt or something.

Um.. I'm thirsty. I want a soda. I want a soda. I want a soda. :[ That brings me to another interesting point. Finally I decided to quit being a mysterious faj about my weight and outright admitted to my good internet buddy "The Enemy", that I could probably stand to lose ten, maybe twenty pounds. I still look better than most of you, America. I just hink I could stand to lose a little and then all the ladies will totally talk to me right? :[ I was actually doing pretty well for a while, but then I got a bag of chips and I think all of it reappeared. Stupid metaolism. Oh well. I've sort of put all my social times away for college mentally. Most teenagers seem a bit intellectually infantile to me, so I'm hoping that'll change and I'll have better social times there.

Oh well. I've blogged for a while, and it sort of felt good to ramble like that. Screw you, I'm not spell checking anything. This is "raw" or something. I'll probably flail around trying to find a snack or something and then read this STUPID book and make a STUPID outline for the STUPID thing I have to write about it and then STUPIDLY make an essay and I hate ruining the arts by pretending they're real educational subjects. :[